"Despair" & More by Balm in Gilead (San Diego, CA)

I've been holding on to these particular images for a while now, with plans of eventually releasing them into the online world with some kind of uncomfortably (perhaps) personal story to go along with them. Perhaps a myriad of stories; such as examples from all the moments in my life that have left me feeling this way; the moments that have stayed with me on many sleepless nights, and blindly raging mornings; the moments that I have caused this feeling, and known this, but only in the way a passing stranger might know that your eyes are blue; and all the reasons and events and Why Why Why's that have brought me to this place, over, and over, and over again in my life.

But instead I will just say that, on some days, this is me. 

"Despair"

And on other, equally distraught days, I am more like this.

"Choosing Chains"

But of course, most days these images are not me. Deep down, these images are never me. They are just moments; moments that I have known too strong and too often, but still, just moments. Not labels, or definitions, or personality traits (or flaws). Merely moments. So on most days, most moments here are images that much more accurately represent who I am, truly.

Thanks guys. Let me know anything and everything these images inspire you to share back. Unlike a lot of my shoots, the concepts for this particular one were mainly my own, but of course cultivated as a team effort, and only possible thanks to the four other individuals involved. You can also check out the Behind the Scenes (kinda) video on my boobtube channel.

XoXo
JNT

P.S. For anyone interested, I did in fact post a corresponding "Despair" poem a while back on the FascistBook.

Images CR Balm in Gilead 2015 or as otherwise credited.
Please do not share without also crediting <3

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